Another ready made life  is being sold on ebay, that of a Mr Usher.

Does this story usher in a new era or is it all a bit deja vu.

Lets explore this further by considering the many personality liquidations and lives for sale in previous listings on ebay.  ebay

Who could forget the $30,000 bid for a “a life for sale” where a Woollongong’s philosophy student decided to liquidate his identity (including his tension filled relationship with his ex-girlfriend). 

Or the plight of kimbaspec trying to flog a “collectable personality”  featured by pinkcarauction and which was passed in without a solitary bid.  Being a hobbyist seller on ebay myself otherwise known as  bluechload the subject is close to my heart.  Of course I would never consider selling my ebay persona, and anyway ebay does allow you to have two personas. 

The  fact that kimbaspec happens to be my other persona, whose auction didn’t garnish any interest whatsoever is neither here nor there.

I can assure you there is  absolutely no animus arising from that lost sale.  For had there been animus, I surely would have thrown it in as an optional extra in my auction listing, as animus, hang ups, tension and dysfunctional aspects of a life or personality seemingly feature very well on the life auction scene. 

How many lives, identities, imaginary friends, alter egos and collectable personalities have been under the hammer? 

Adding to the already ridiculous list of things like cheese sandwiches which contain images of Christ, we are now  witnessing intangible ‘offerings’ or services, ranging from past relationships, jobs, friendships and even souls appearing on online auction sites like ebay.

Does this much publicised auction of Mr Usher’s life stand out amongst the already crowded field of image seeking gimmicky publicity stunts?  Not really.

But it is well organised.  It has ushered in a well constructed websitewww.life4sale.com, on which the vendor ‘Mr Usher’ tells us how hesitant he was to share his personal story with even a single sole. 

Evidently he has somehow pushed through that difficult barrier, as he plans to release his story by writing four books, each made up of 12 parts, with one book being released in the middle of each month leading up to the auction.

My question is will the winner of the auction acquires the copyright on the books and royalties or will they go to the author who sold everything lock, stock and barrel relating to his previous life??

Surely Mr Usher if you get the entire life that includes the right to write about it, past or present!!

Otherwise you could be accused of in effect profiting from somebody else’s life story. Then you would just be a run of the mill journalist. 

Those familiar with “All my Life For Sale” by John Freyer may see some striking similarities between Mr Usher’s approach and that of Mr Freyers who owned a website called allmylifeforsale.com and wrote a book about his venture.

Maybe Mr Usher has been profiting from other lives, namely Mr Freyers.

To those contemplating bidding on Mr Usher’s life caveat emptor. Make sure you clarify these issues in advance.

Mr Usher could be little more than a glorified broker/trafficker in the life appropriation business.  

kittyhello1.jpg

The Hello Kitty Slender Shaper promises to burn fat off your midriff with the push of a button.

I have three “geriatric cats”. My not so little chub, pictured below, has had some work done. Look closely and you can see she had her ears done as they were pre-cancerous. She looks a little like a puma, although as she knows you can only tell from certain angles, and not as much from her best side.

Recently she had everything from a blood work up to an MRI and spinal tap to try to find the cause of her ‘minor seizures’. They couldn’t find anything and were stunned by how healthy she was. They called her brain “beautiful” with symmetrical smooth lobes, and looked at it admiringly on the CD they showed me for my $2000 I had parted with to find out what ailed Chubb.

But Chubb does have a serious fat pad. Having asked whether it was prolapse the vet assured me it was a fat pad. It literally drags along the ground. Chubb is otherwise a healthy 7kg cat, healthy in every way particularly for a 15 year old feline, and since being on a mild dose of phenobarbitone to prevent her having seizures has become a bit sedentary in the barbituate zone.

The Hello Kitty Slender Shaper would be perfect for a cat like Chubb.

Move over Hello Kitty, here comes Chubb, right behind you.

She is a merchandiser’s dream.

Would you pimp your cat??

pc250722.jpg

Britney is reported to be feeling blue and thinking pink

bspearsapple120507_06.jpg

I don’t know what Britney feels like to have lost custody of her children.

It is probably easier to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all so they say.

I have been trying and desparately wanting a child since I was as young as Britney. Its been a long period of yearning, hoping, feeling bent, misshapen and forlorn.

Unfortunately, due to a misdiagnosis, the best Doctors/Gynos overlooked something so simple in my partner which makes me a livid shade of pink.

There is no cloud with a pink lining without Paris Hilton like pink currency to go overseas. There is no adoption for practical purposes where I hail from.

Needless to say, as gorgeous as all of the cars I’ve written about are, I’d give up a fleet of  pink cadillacs, volkswagens, bugattis,  houses and  gadgets to make that distant dream come true.  I’d paint myself any shade of pink and write about anything pink 24/7,  cars, gadgets and even wigs.

The  obvious question is why someone might write about all things pink and the many other mindless in such a maniacal fashion?  I’m a little melancholic at the moment,  but I suspect it is some form of pink sublimation to hasten the slow but invariable descent into madness.

Britney is a mum.  I have the best mum in the world,  and if I could be just 10% as good a mum as my mum,  I would be very proud of myself.

My favourite pink car is the one that isn’t a car and isn’t even pink if the truth be known.

My idea of a Rolls Royce is a child to love and cherish.